They S#!% They Should’ve Shown Recap

Bananas in Nany's Dress

Bananas in Nany’s Dress

Notable notes from the outtake special.

Missed Fantasy Scoring Opportunities

Zach naked all the time. According to the special, Mr. Muscle Man America was the King of Nudity. If you had Zach on your fantasy team, you were robbed nudity points ( per instance they should’ve shown).

Naked Zach

Naked Zach

Again, MTV editing team, please pay attention to our league and its scoring system and edit in a way that allows for us to collect more points!

Interesting… this S#!% They Should’ve Shown special revealed no secret hook ups. This season seemed to really lack in the hooking up department. We enacted the Nany Rule, awarding players for hooking up with two different people in the same episode, and no one earned points from this.

It’s interesting to note that we enacted the vomit rule before Free Agents and there were no vomits during that season. This season, however, featured many vomits. Maybe next season will have more sluttery and there will be many Nany Bonus points? Is it possible that our rookie rules, like rookies themselves, tend to fail in their first season?

Nia Problems

Nia stuffs her bra with tissues. She also sucks her thumb and has tantrums. It’s almost too obvious to call her childish and/or immature.

Oh, she’s also a little dirty. Sure, the Challenge house is no clean place. As you could see from the power couple dinner, MTV doesn’t spend money on better than the finest microwavable pizza, so they sure don’t spring for maid service.

Nia got herself some ringworm… sexy. Zach was pissed cause they had to close the gym one day to sanitize the house. Yeah, MTV only bothers to properly sanitize the house after Nia rolls around on the sweaty gym floor (so gross) before jumping in the pool Wes & CT use as a shower, getting herself some ringworm.

Rookies of the Season

There was a nice little segment on how Jenna was the “hot” female rookie (sorry Brittany, Averey, Simone and Hailey), but she’s a total ditz. An airhead who thought a dingleberry was a fruit. REMEMBER: Her and Jay won the trivia challenge. That fact will never become not amazing.

For the guys, Adam seems to have been declared by the powers that be (editors or cast consensus – tough to tell) to be the “hot” male rookie (sorry Jay, Thomas and JJ). But Adam has tiny hands, smaller than Jordan’s half-hand (according to Jordan) and made for a decent stripper.

Sweetness

Knight Scavenger Hunt

Knight Scavenger Hunt

NOTE: I had a baby last week so I’m very hormonal. With that disclaimer, I now reveal that yes, I cried during this special. I know, I know…

It was from the footage of Knight’s last night. As Wes so accurately said, “I knew Knight was going home the next day because… well, that’s what Knight does when he goes into eliminations.” Then Wes set up a scavenger hunt of notes around the the house to get clues until he ends up by the pool, attacked by water trash cans full of water.

Knight, a happy-go-lucky goofball, enjoyed being the subject of the cast members’ efforts. For people like Wes, it was the last night they hung with Knight and it was a very positive, fun memory.

Funny Stuff

Wes has Jonna do his dishes in exchange for hugs, compliments and bogus hypnosis/meditation time. Oh, Jonna… how much damage did Zach cause to your sense of self-worth?

There were other more innocent things going on… Painting toe nails, Zach having a diabetic shock attack, Knight in cornrows, Bananas wearing Nany’s dress, Wes being afraid of spiders and other such camp-like shenanigans were part of life in Panama for the Challengers.

 

Shout out to DJ Assault, whose Hoez Get Naked has always been a terrific tune.

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